I feel like my mind is running in a fury. A speeding barrel rolling down a hill. The force of the speed trying to throw the staves off, at the same time the impact of each connection with the ground seeming to want to push the walls inside. The forces balanced so perfectly, nothing could move in either direction. The forces are balanced. How to explain what that means, what it feels like to have the push and pull of speed balanced out. One thing could go wrong, one moment faster or slower could destroy the balance so quickly. At the same time though, the balance is amazing. My mind seems to be running along between being unable to think clearly, and also seeing all of the things around me more cleanly than ever before. Like my voice is stuck in my head, but also, my thoughts are clear. I had a flashback to my first moments of remembering. How long ago that all seemed.

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I was at the ocean again. In the water, or at the edge of the water. I wasn’t sure where in the world i was. I wasn’t sure if this even was our world, but I knew it must be. None of my dreams are ever in places that don’t seem in some way real and whole. I don’t think even my strangest dreams seem to be unlinked to some form of reality. Even the ones that seem surreal and crazy, seem to be set and populated with real people, and real places. Just linked in someway to a fantastic setting that seems more of a movie set than real life.

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It was a joy. A joy of so much freedom last night. So much and so long since i have had dreams of water. So long without my dreams of waves, and water, and running. I couldn’t believe it. When i woke up in my dream, i was already moving. I remember the water was green, and blue. It felt like electricity, and life itself. I remember the moon was high in the sky, and I could almost feel the waves being pulled up.

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